Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Today was one of those days when you don't see it coming.
Last night, I stopped eating at 7:00 to fast for my blood work this morning. I couldn't find any sub jobs (which I am beyond despising at this point) and went to bed with a plan in place for today.
When the alarm went off at 6:30, I was going to:
go get my blood work done
clean up the house
list things on eBay
and generally rest because I am still sick and without much of a voice

I turned on the laptop in bed
and checked my email.
Then I noticed,
I had a sub job at 8:15.

My first reaction?
I thought Tim had accepted a job online for me because I have been so sick lately, I haven't worked much. And I really need to....but I don't need any extra guilt about me not making the kind of money I did out in Cali.
He was innocent though.

I let it sink in.
Then I got really frustrated.
And I kind of wanted to just freak out,
because it was all so stupid
I just couldn't take it anymore.
The teacher didn't leave an email,
and no voicemail.
She just plugged me into the system at 5:30 am.
And it was too late to cancel the job,
and besides,
that would have made me look like a complete flake to that school.
The very school I would love to work at.

So I scrambled and pouted...
and made my way over to the school.
And on the way there,
I cried and wondered
Just how I got here...

And I told the secretaries what had happened.
In the nicest way,
but come on.
If I hadn't seen that online,
or hadn't shown up.
They wouldn't have been in a bad position.

But by this happening,
I found out something.
A teacher I was talking to is going to live abroad next year.
And it taking a leave of absence.
An opportunity perhaps.
But unsure of what to do exactly.
Any advice?

So tonight,
fasting #2.
And tomorrow,
I'm hoping for only pleasant surprises please.

1 comment:

Scanlans said...

Julie, I found your blog through a friend and was just heartbroken when I read the news a couple of days ago. When I read your blog, I can feel God and I can feel your faith and that it is so REAL. It is not faith that's plastered on with a smile and the kind where you say "everything will be great!", but really don't believe it. You have genuine faith in our God and genuine faith that He is good despite what you've been through. Even though there's lots of questions you'd like answered and doubts you'd like squashed and problems you'd like solved, you press on in your love for Him. You remind me of so many people in the Bible (Abraham, Moses, Job..) who doubted God's plan, but always returned to their unshakable faith in Him.
I know you'd rather have another precious gift in your life right now, but your gift to everyone is showing how powerful God's love is. Even though you have been through so many valleys where you should be so angry and want to give up on Him, His love and grace draw you back on. That's how amazing He is, and that's what you show others. I am praying for you and I've got my bible study ladies praying for you. I know you will be blessed because you are the poster child for a good and faithful servant! Thank you for your gifts to us and we will all rejoice when God reveals what wonderful gifts he has in store for you!