Saturday, December 19, 2009


I haven't written in a really long time again.
Not that I don't think about it, 
but the things that are happening around me aren't exactly
happy or hope inspiring.
And after all, things are tough right now for a lot of people.
So when even worse things happen,
it hits hard.

The night before Thanksgiving,
I opened an email not knowing what it held.
It was simply a sales ad from a Marine store...
but it also held various other topics.
It held the news that one of Tim's snipers,
Charles Cartwright,
had been killed in Afghanistan on Nov. 7th.
But we didn't find out until later,
and missing his funeral deeply affected us.
I want to write about him, because the last few weeks have been spent remembering him and trying to make sense out it.
And I believe, that to honor these to speak of them. To share who they were, and why the loss is staggering.

Out of Tim's snipers, I had a few favorites...
Charlie was for sure one of them.
He was goofy and his smile...
it was the kind that made you smile just by seeing it.
He was a great Marine.
When I opened that email and saw his picture,
all I could do was scream...
it couldn't be him.
The picture above is Tim's platoon in Iraq. Charlie is in the back row without a hat.
I love this picture,
and I laugh because I see the personalities shine through.

I've been extremely blessed to know so many giving
and courageous...and hilariously funny Marines.
Live hard, play hard...
that is what we always said.
Times spent with these guys, were some of the best of my life.

But life is hard when you have to live to see  your young friends die.
Wonderful men who chose this life...
and loved it.
I know Cartwright loved what he did.
It doesn't make it any easier.
Because 26 is too young.

And so as Christmas creeps closer,
I think about so many families that are living without.
Without their homes, without their jobs...without a loved one.
And what really breaks my heart, is that now I know the pain that sits in your soul when your child dies before you...

So today, when I got my termination letter for my job...
I was surprised and disappointed,
yet with everything that has happened it takes a heck of a lot more to defeat me nowadays.
Sure I lost my job less than a week before Christmas.
But I find myself not really caring.
Because in the big scheme of things,
it doesn't really matter.

Knowing people like Charlie,
inspire Tim & I to keep our heads up.
I can't help but think back to this fall,
and see the series of events that took place.
Each one acting as a stepping stone to take me to the next.
I just have to have faith,
this this is another one of those stepping stones.
That somehow, it all will fit together for a greater good.


Penni said...

Saying a special prayer for you tonight. Please know that I extremely mindful and thankful for everything that every single Marine, soldier, pilot has done for me and my family. So sorry about your job.

Elizabeth said...

I'm one of those people whose life is largely untouched by these wars -- at least in the obvious ways. There are vets in my family from previous wars, none currently serving. My cousin spent most of his time in the Coast Guard in Key West, a post not without its own dangers, but I never worried about IEDs, you know. So anyway, what I'm saying is that it's easy to forget, to turn off the news and get caught up in what I need to do today. Thanks for the reminder, and I will pray for your family, and for your Marine friends. What they do makes it possible for me to go on with my day and forget.