I suddenly realized that I was heading to the doctor
and it didn't even cross my mind not to wear mascara.
It was one of those things that changed as soon as we got Will's diagnosis...
I just stopped wearing eye makeup because every time I went to the doctor,
And never mind wearing anything like that for months after he died...
But somewhere between all that and then right now,
I have learned to live again.
And I gladly put on mascara this morning,
a sign that things were...and are changing...
The doctor visit went fine.
Nothing new to report.
Sadly, my favorite ultrasound tech was not there,
so I didn't get hooked up with any sweet 3D images again.
But I am going back in 2 weeks and am not leaving without some sort of picture:)
Today, I was just so thankful to have a normal visit.
However, I did leave with something pretty great...
My own personal version of a lottery ticket.
It is worth some money, but only to me.
I am now the proud owner of a doctor's note...
that freezes my gym membership.
I am officially relieved of any exercise or as the marines call it: PT,
or guilt associated with not going.
And I couldn't be more thrilled.
I literally danced downt the hall at the office, waving the note in my hand to my nurse friends...
For those of you that know me, this is funny. (and probably a little sad)
Being married to a Marine, means that we are a physically fit family.
And there is no such thing as not feeling well, or skipping out on working out...
I still remember being pregnant with Will,
living in CA before anything was amiss and being guilted into going to base to work out.
I went for Tim.
Really I went just so he would stop bugging me...
But being in the first trimester, as we drove I began to feel sick.
As we pulled up to the gym, I begged him to stop by the PX so I could get a snack.
I ran inside,
and grabbed a very nutritious snack.
The only thing that sounded good to my gurgling stomach:
A Cherry Coke and huge stick of Laughy-Taffy.
I was then convinced that I was too sick to actually go inside with Tim.
He scoffed as I pointed out that I still "went TO the gym with him..."
And as my husband ran and worked his little heart out,
I sat in the car with the moon roof open,
relaxing in the warm California sun...drinking pop and eating candy.
And as a platoon of Marines ran by the parking lot,
I felt slightly guilty.
Especially when the Marines in back of the group (that looked like they were going to pass out) eye-balled me sitting in the car being a big fat lazy butt.
But here's the thing,
I really didn't care.
Just like now.
I am careful about what I eat because I don't want to become diabetic again,
and I want what is best for my body and the baby...
but when it comes to staying in shape?
Again, I really don't care.
Its not worth risking anything all over again.
Besides, I can always register for a jogging stroller and burn off those fat rolls...
after the baby is here safe and sound.
So not being able to work out?
I could not be happier:)