I checked in on my blog and realized that I haven't posted anything for the entire month of June...what in the world is wrong with me?!
Oh yeah, I am pregnant and chasing after an 11 month old. Despite everything that we have been through, I have to confess that the other day we were driving and I told Tim that I was almost expecting something bad to happen again. I mean, the road with Jack hasn't been paved in gold, but he brings so much joy to our lives...and the past few months (now that I am past the morning sickness and such) things have been, well, good.
Do you realize that I thought I would NEVER be able to say that ever again after Will died??
I still have days where I cry, and miss him terribly. But the truth is, his death is just so much a part of me now that I carry it around without noticing it some days. Its always there, I always feel it...but I can now function and appear to others as if nothing ever happened.
Not sure if that is good or bad,
but that is what it is...
In a few days it will be July. Wednesday we find out if we are having a boy or girl. And somehow time just keeps moving forward. In just a few short weeks, Will would have been 3 years old. How did that happen? And how is Jack almost 1 already?
All I know, is that I enjoy every single day. Thus, the lack of blogs...I've just been too busy keeping up with my little monkey. But I want to write more, because one day, I'll want to look back and remember these good days, just as I continue to occasionally look back at my older blogs to remember the bad ones....
And say a huge prayer of thanks when I realize just how far we have come.